Five Great Ways To Make Your Running Boring

Alternative Title: 5 Ways You're Probably Running

Before I start the article let me just announce a few things…

I’m going to start adding little blurbs (yes, blurbs) and some links after the article. This will start to resemble more of a Newsletter and less of a single article. Hoping this makes Coach Bennett’s Newsletter more fun and engaging every week.

Also, thank you to everyone that reads, shares, subscribes or has donated towards a subscription.You may have noticed that there is an option to subscribe and donate some $ towards the Newsletter. There is zero obligation to. CoachBennett′s Newsletter remains free. That′s why I wanted to be sure to thank those of you that have donated. You probably realize that I have not accepted any of the donated subscriptions yet. I wanted to make sure I was writing consistently enough to merit what you donated. I’m really proud of what this has become and is becoming. I’ll start accepting the donations now and will work even harder to make this the best newsletter about running… and not about running there is.

Cheers and enjoy this edition of Coach Bennett’s Newsletter.

Coach Bennett

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Five Great Ways To Make Your Running Boring

Alternative Title: 5 Ways You're Probably Already Running

Running is boring. Ugh! If I had a nickel for every time somebody told me this I’d have a whole bunch of nickels. Too many nickels. And yes, one can have too many nickels. At some point you need to either upgrade to dimes or take the plunge and get some dang quarters. Besides, you can play video games with quarters and even score some chiclet-esque gum on the way out of the food store sometimes. Seriously, there are candy machines that still rock the entrance/exit of grocery stores. I’m being honest. You’ve just grown up and stopped seeing things that once caught your attention.

What human under the age of 12 ever went on the dreaded grocery store trip with a parent and didn’t case the joint for the candy and cheap toy machines? Any kid who wasn’t on the lookout for these joy machines was no kid you could trust to lie about how that old vase broke or why you really were so late for dinner… again.

What happened? Where was I?

I know I was talking about running there for a minute and then I kinda blacked out? Sometimes the rambles come so quickly and just take over and the next thing I know is that I don’t know what the next thing I was going to say was.

Anyway, I’m back.

And that means back to the nonsense!

Running… is… boring.

No, my friend, running is not boring. But some runners sure are. And normally this is where I would go on some epic quest to convince you of all the ways that running is fun and exciting and scary and challenging and totally bonkers and really just about one of the healthiest adventures you can go on each and every day. But I’m getting bored of doing that. So I figured I’d take some of my own medicine here and mix… things… up. Instead of telling you a whole bunch of ways to make your running more exciting I’m going to tell you the opposite.

I’m going to take time out of my day to teach you how to make your running boring.

Excited? You shouldn’t be. Kind of defeats the purpose of this entire exercise.

Let’s begin. Yawn.

#1 Run the same loop or route every day

Here’s a golden oldie. How does this sound? Start your run and trace the exact same route that you ran on the last run… and the run before that… and the run before that. Think of all the pointless questions you could answer! Did Old Man Johnson down the road finally mow his lawn? Maybe today will be the day! Why are you so invested in whether or not Old Man Johnson mows his stupid lawn? Could it be that you run past it every single day on the way out for your 3.57 mile run and pass it again on your way back in from your 3.57 mile run? Maybe!

And if the lawn still hasn’t been mowed maybe what will excite you is whether or not the GPS measured your run at 3.57 miles or rips you off and only gives you 3.56 miles! Darn satellites. They don’t make them like they used to. Anyway, enjoy seeing the exact same stuff on the exact same route and exploring nothing new. Sound boring? It does? Makes sense. Because running the same loop every day is boring. Might be easy. Didn’t say it wasn’t. Just said it was boring and the point of this article is to make running boring.

#2 Run with the same effort every day

Every day is an easy day. Doesn’t matter how you feel. You feel great? Don’t care. Run easy. No matter what… do not… I repeat… do not allow yourself the freedom to respond to how you feel. Do not let yourself let it rip. Do not let yourself charge up the hill or fly down the trail or sprint the last straightaway. Just run easy… every day. If you do that… you’ll be bored! That’s the point!

A more damaging alternative to the above is to make every day a hard day. No… matter… what. Granted, this version usually ends in some kind of epic flame out. And epic flame outs are dangerously close to being dangerous. So, I’m going to nix the hard every day alternative to the safer and extraordinarily boring every day is an easy day example. Safety first folks. Even when you’re a boring runner at least be a safe and boring runner. (Although being hurt all the time is also really boring!)

#3 Stay away from the track and/or speed runs

The track is scary. The track is intimidating. The track is wild. The track is where you can tap into that little kid that still lives inside of you and you can turn up the volume all the way up to ten… no… the volume on the track goes to eleven! That’s exactly why we want to stay away from the track. Running fast can be fun. We want none of that. Running speed runs… like long or short intervals at different paces and efforts and with different recoveries… is challenging and challenges can lead to breakthroughs and broken barriers and maybe even joy or epiphanies! We are not into any of that. We want toast and no jelly. We want to eat pizza with a knife and fork. We want the shortened radio edit of Stairway to Heaven. We want the Florida HS Summer reading list. What we don’t want is anything that might force us to dig deep, get nervous, open our minds, challenge us or see the sport or ourselves in a new way. No. No way. Leave the track to the real runners… whatever the heck that means.

#4 Be a jerk to yourself

You want a surefire way for your run to not only be really boring but also truly miserable? Double bonus here! Be a jerk to yourself. That’s right. Tell yourself that you’re not good enough, you don’t have what it takes, you’re unfit physically or emotionally or mindfully or you’re the Triple Crown winner and unfit across all three measurements. Tell yourself that you suck at running and suck at taking on challenges and suck at commitment and suck at following through and suck at… well… everything. Ugh. I’m bored just typing this crap. Success! And what’s even better here is that you’ll also start to talk trash about running! Sure, you suck at running but running sucks too! (You think it’s boring to read this? Try typing it! Boring to the max!) So, instead of being a great teammate, coach and friend to yourself out there on the run and working towards a successful and dare I say… fun run… by all means please be sure to beat up and bore yourself. It’s also a great way to make sure you don’t ever want to cross a starting line for another run.

#5 Don’t care

One of the truly under-appreciated ways to make your running journey boring (and anything else for that matter) is to simply not care about it. The run sucked? Who cares? Why wonder why it sucked? It doesn’t matter why because you don’t care about your running. Your run was actually pretty good? Should you celebrate that? Why? Who cares? Not you! That’s right! You don’t care because you don’t care about anything. Isn’t running so much easier when you don’t care if you’re enjoying the running or running the right way or running the wrong way or helping someone else be a part of or not apart from the sport? Isn’t it easier to not care whether or not you’re handing the baton off in a better place than you got it? Of course it’s easier!

Not caring is super easy to do. Don’t care about whether the runs you are doing are making you a better or worse version of yourself. Don’t care if the type of run you’re running is the right type of run to do. The great thing here is that when nothing really matters then nothing you do needs to be done. No amount of effort makes it meaningful. No number of minutes or meters or miles will make a difference. And that means you can’t change because of a run. That means the run can’t take you somewhere better because you don’t care if you go somewhere better. That means every run takes you nowhere. Every run you don’t do takes you to the same place! And not going anywhere… never changing… is boring. And who cares about something that’s so boring? Not you!

That’s it. I’m done.

I hope you’re bored.

Actually, that’s a lie. I’m a coach and a coach should never lie to an athlete. I actually hope this was meaningful. I hope this article makes your running journey a little better. I hope this mattered. Because I do care. And I know you do too. How do I know that? Because you’re still reading. You’re hoping that what I’m writing can help you become a better runner (or person) in some way. So, let me end by telling you this. If you care… if you have hope… if you’re willing to commit to and work towards something that excites you or inspires you or motivates you then you’re a badass as far as I’m concerned.

And there ain’t nothing boring about a person like you.

And only boring people think running is boring.

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EPISODE 4 of COACH BENNETT’S PODCAST IS OUT!

MAYBE YOU CAN’T MEANS MAYBE YOU CAN

Listen to the latest Coach Bennett's Podcast here on Apple

Or listen here on Spotify:

Celebrating episode 4 with a refreshed Coach Bennett’s Mixtape!

You can check it out on Spotify here:

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I’m on STRAVA now… and yes, I’m still on the Nike Run Club app.

This Summer you will finally be able to share your NRC training with Strava.

So, if you wan’t to hang out on Strava you can follow me just by tapping here.

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WORTH A FOLLOW

Hoping to make this a consistent feature of the Coach Bennett’s Newsletter and also hope it allows me a chance to share with you people, places, content or events that I believe can inspire, motivate, entertain, educate or help you or just simply deserve some of your attention.

My first call out for this new section has to go to the best coach in the Bennett house. That’s tammie. You may know her as the host of the Show Up Society Podcast or as the certified life and mindset coach or even as the far more talented co-host of the great Two Coach Bennetts Talking Podcast. I can’t recommend you follow tammie enough and please listen to both her podcasts and check out her personal coaching. She’s a total badass.

(And tammie likes her name spelled with all lower case letters)

Here are all the places you can follow tammie:

Click here to check out the Show Up Society website

Show Up Society Podcast:

Two Coach Bennett’s Talking Podcast:

And you can follow tammie on Instagram as @showupsociety ***************************************************

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Well, that’s it for this week. Thank you for reading! Please think about sharing Coach Bennett’s Newsletter with friends and family. The more we have coming to this starting lines with us the better.

Cheers,

Coach Bennett