Balancing Imbalance
It doesn't need to make sense to work.
I got asked to write about finding balance as a dad, husband, coach, writer, friend, brother, son, uncle and ardent supporter of 80’s music. If you’re reading this expecting a detailed map to find balance in your life… I’ll have you know ahead of time there’s no map. At least I don’t have one. I’ve never found the mythical balance that so many gurus love to talk about. What I have found is that my life is always imbalanced. And I’m okay with that. In fact, I believe that’s the way life is supposed to be.
I don’t think there is some percentage break down of how much “dad” I’m supposed to be and how much “coach” I’m supposed to be. I do know that when I’m 100% invested in my coaching or writing or defending the merits of a certain New Wave band that I’m also still a 100% a dad and 100% a brother. I know I’m also 100% on the hook for cleaning up all the dog poop in the back yard and I’ll probably need to go pick up that broken glass by the curb that somebody failed to clean up because if I don’t do it maybe no one else will. That’s a whole bunch of 100%’s. Something is not adding up. Unless you realize that things don’t always add up to the numbers you want them to. The equations we rely on in life (and running) operate under a different set of rules from those you found in your math textbook. Sometimes in life one side of the equation doesn’t equal the other side and yet it still works.
I’ll give you some examples. I know that when an athlete has nothing left they still have something left as long as that something is for someone else and not for themselves. You can’t do another interval? I get it. Can you help Sheena do one more though? She’s struggling. This would be a huge breakthrough for her to knock out one more interval at this pace. You can? You can do one more for her? Great! Thank you.
Now that’s something coming from nothing. Does the math check out? Nope. Does it still work? Yup. I see it happen all the time. Both sides of the equation are not equal and yet everything seems to check out. Maybe it’s more like imbalanced stability. Is that a thing? Probably not. Architects and engineers are vigorously shaking their heads. Relax nerds. I’m still fleshing this out. You might think this is nonsense. Well, sometimes nonsense makes the most sense.
Like I said already, I’m okay with it being like that. I was never great at math to begin with. So this kind of algebra (or would it be calculus) makes sense to me. I can work with these kinds of problems. And I don’t need one of those JV computers that my kids call calculators nowadays to figure out what sometimes can’t be figured out. Besides, I don’t need balance in my life. I just need to know what’s important.
And I need to know that I’m always going to need some help. I need my kids and my wife and my athletes and my readers and my parents and my siblings and my friends and my neighbors to know that I’m trying my best. I need them to know that I will always be there to help them when this life seems like it’s all too much. I need them to know that if they ever feel like the things in their life are slipping out of their grasp… if they feel like they are starting to stumble… if they feel like they are losing their balance… I need them to know that I’ll be there to help them. I need them to know that I look to them for the same.
You see, you’ll never balance everything in your life on your own. But with some help… when you share those weights you carry with the people in your life… and when you help carry the weights the people in your life are carrying… you’ll be balancing all those things in your life that matter to you.
Cheers,
Coach Bennett
MILLROSE!!
Was it the greatest Millrose Games ever? Maybe. Maybe it was. All I need to do is ask a loaded question like that and consider the hornets nest stirred! There have been 117 Millrose Games after all. So, can I say without a doubt it was the best one ever? No. Not yet. I need a little more time to process what I saw. What I do know is that I jumped off my couch a bunch of different times during the TV broadcast.
I’m not going to spoil the meet for you if you haven’t watched it yet but let me say this… it’s been DAYS since the meet ended! What are you waiting for? I’d be well within my social media rights to spoil this whole meet for you. Saturday. Sunday. Monday. Tuesday. What have you been doing?
Many of you probably watched that snoozefest of a Super Bowl. You would have been better served watching Millrose. Besides, it’s YOUR SPORT! Yes, it’s yours! If you run or jump or throw then it’s your sport. Indoor track is yours. Outdoor Track is yours. Trail Running is yours. Cross Country is yours. Road Racing is yours. It’s all yours. And if you want to get better at your sport then one surefire way to do that is to be a fan of it. So, get comfy and enjoy some of the races from the 2025 Millrose Games I’ve attached.
🚨🚨Small warning… the titles of the videos below may give away results. Sorry.
WHAT’S UP WITH THOSE BLACK TOENAILS?
It’s a question I get asked. A lot. So, here’s my answer. Just seems easier to answer everyone at once rather than someone all the time. Just click the pretty face to watch the video.
NEW COACH BENNETT’S PODCASTS!
Seriously… are you subscribed to the podcast? Because you should be. And after you subscribe and listen to a few episodes leave a review and give a rating. Thank you! 🙏
BEST RUNNER EVER: WINTER EDITION IS OFF AND RUNNING
I’m having a (wintry) blast with coach tammie of the show up society and the crew taking part in Best Runner Ever: Winter Edition. The program runs straight through February. For those of you that asked if there will be other BRE’s this year the answer is oh baby YES! We’ve already opened the doors for early registration to Best Runner Ever: Summer Edition. Go ahead and get in there now! Click here for registration details and how you can confirm being a part of Best Runner Ever: Summer Edition!
And if you’re breathlessly awaiting what the new BRE t-shirt will look like… I’m working on it. I’ll share the inevitable masterpiece when it’s complete.
Thank you for reading another issue of Coach Bennett’s Newsletter. I hope you enjoyed it. And if you did enjoy it please tap that ❤️ and leave a comment and share the issue with some friends or family or teammates. Maybe even think about becoming a paid supporter of the newsletter. No matter what though… please invite someone to a starting line. Just make sure what’s on the other side of that line is something that helps them.
Alright, thanks again for reading and running. And thank you to everyone that’s chosen to be a paid supporter of the newsletter. I’m so very grateful for your support. Take care of yourselves. Take care of each other.
I’ll meet you on that next starting line.
Cheers,
Coach Bennett
One of my favorite ways to think of this comes from Nora Roberts where she talks about juggling so many balls in life. She says the key is to know which ones are glass and which are rubber. I thought of this during your last podcast. You might not be able to juggle all the balls at once, but you have to know which ones you can drop (and won't break) and which ones can't be dropped. The answer may change day to day or minute to minute.
This is a great perspective. I am constantly trying to balance all the roles I have in my life - maybe I don’t need to. Leaning on others and allowing others to lean on me could be the best way to keep all the balls in the air.